


Giving up the fight

by inquisitor_larue



Series: Cyberpunk 2077 Flash Fiction / Short Fics [1]
Category: Cyberpunk 2077 (Video Game)
Genre: Confessions, Heavy Angst, I'm Sorry, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, No Beta, Phone Calls & Telephones, References to Depression, Spoilers, Suicide Attempt, i'm not okay, we die like men/women/nb lovelies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-21
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-17 20:01:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 793
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29598003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inquisitor_larue/pseuds/inquisitor_larue
Summary: TW/CW: self hatred, depression, suicidal thoughts, suicide attempt, suicideSpoilers for an unofficial Cyberpunk 2077 ending
Relationships: Kerry Eurodyne/V
Series: Cyberpunk 2077 Flash Fiction / Short Fics [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2174508
Comments: 2
Kudos: 27





	Giving up the fight

**Author's Note:**

> TW/CW: self hatred, depression, suicidal thoughts, suicide attempt, suicide
> 
> Spoilers for an unofficial Cyberpunk 2077 ending. (gun based)
> 
> My brain is an asshole have my angst and self hatred.

V’s hands were shaking, holding his phone and staring out at the city beyond the image of Johnny in front of him. 

“You want to call Ker?” Johnny wasn’t as surprised as V had expected him to be. Probably shouldn’t be surprised about that. He was, after all, able to see everything V did and he and Kerry hadn’t exactly been subtle. “ I’m not saying anything choom, just get it over with before you keel over again alright?” 

Watching Johnny turn to once again stare out at the glaring neon of night city V tried to still his hands and nerve long enough to just get this phone call over with. Pressing the call button V straightened in his seat taking a deep breath to try and calm himself down.

“V?” Kerry picked up sounding confused. “What’s up?”

“Just wondering if y- if you were sticking to your resolution? Not blown up any yachts without me have you?” V tried to laugh, to play off all of the pain that was trying to pierce through his voice. Kerry had enough to worry about without having to listen to V’s problems too. V struggled to hold himself together seeing Kerry start laughing. V fought to keep himself centred in the moment it would be for the best to go through with everything like he had planned, least amount of blood, least amount of bodies and the corpos don’t get to win.

Holding his hands up defensively Kerry replied, “Shit man you got me! Guess I’ll have to reschedule my afternoon, maybe record a new track instead? That yacht scum may getaway for now but I know you’re down for a round 2 at sooome point right?” The teasing way he stretched out the words sent a shiver down V’s back as he averted his gaze from the holo. Looking back up V saw the concern and worry in Kerry’s eyes. “Is everything okay? Did you need something darling?” As he speaks Kerry flips the bird to someone just off-screen before turning his attention back to V.

“Yeah, I just…” V could barely keep his focus on the conversation “I just wanted to hear your voice, Ker... I love you so much and I want you to be careful and stay safe okay? For me? Promise?” V forced himself to shut up, rambling would give him away or make Kerry worry and even Johnny was sneaking glances at him and when a fucking ghost feels sorry for you then you can pretty much call it a new low.

“You stay safe too V. I love you too. Speak soon okay?” Seeing those eyes stare straight into his soul V panicked.

“I’ll….try?” Before he could second guess himself V hung up the call and turned his attention back to Johnny and the table next to where he placed the phone. 

“It’s good you called. I never got the chance.” The engram flickered closer to V staring down at him. “I know Rogue and I can get this done please V give us the chance. We’ve stormed ‘Saka tower twice before, what’s once more?” Johnny was trying to make eye contact a pensive look on his face.  
“There is another way…” Johnny’s eyes followed V’s to where his gaze hadn’t left the table and the gun laying on it. With barely a second thought V balled up his fist and threw away the pills he had been holding. “This way we can both be aware… go out on our own terms.” Johnny’s form flickered and he appeared in the chair next to V.

“You always find a way to surprise me you know. It’s not the way I would have done it but if you’re sure. It’s been nice working with you V.” Johnny watched V closely as he nodded and picked up the pistol Vik had placed out for him before he left the ripper’s clinic. V’s hands had finally stopped shaking as he placed the barrel of the gun to his temple. 

Looking out over the city V tried to think back on any good memory he could drag out of the ruins of his life and felt a wave of guilt and hatred wash over him. He ruined every good thing he had or was that the city’s doing? Not that it mattered, if he was no more then the flowers beneath his boots could finally be left to flourish untouched. Saving one final thought for what he was leaving behind V placed his finger instinctively on the trigger. 

“You too Johnny.” 

Before he could change his mind V pulled the trigger, gunshot echoing through the strangely quiet air on the rooftop before being swallowed up by the cacophony of the city below.

**Author's Note:**

> Minor end game spoilers Suicide ending.  
> Kerry's anger at V ending his life gave me a wake up call on my own suicidal thoughts and depression and the fact that I felt guilty I guess gives me a horse back in the race. Thanks Cyberpunk we'll see how this goes.


End file.
